Age Appropriate Chores for Children

Do you ever find yourself wondering what types of chores your child is capable of performing or how to help motivate them to do chores in the first place? Here are five helpful tips to consider.

Why is knowing about Child Development Important?

Some parents tell me they are not interested in completing a developmental screening because their child is not behind. A common myth about these screenings are that they are only looking for delays in your child’s development. The Ages and Stages Questionnaire administered by Help Me Grow does so much more than identify delays. It also helps caregivers to see the strengths their child has and how much they are already learning even as young as 2 months.

When Will My Child Learn Colors?

I often get questions from parents wondering if their child is colorblind. This concern arises when their child cannot seem to identify a correct color. 

Why the concern? Often our only benchmark of knowing when children should be able to do something is by comparing her to the neighbor child! It is natural to be concerned when the neighbor kid can consistently identify his colors, count to 10, and know his shapes before your child can. 

Taking the Guilt out of Parenting

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This quote is all about perspective. It's about changing the way you think, and striving for positive outcomes for your own children and the children around you. With so much negativity in the world, it can sometimes be hard to feel like you're a good parent, and that you're doing enough for your kids. So how do you take the guilt out of parenting?

Mental Health Awareness Month

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May is National Mental Health Awareness Month! In our society, the topic of mental health has historically experienced a negative stigma and people often avoid discussing it, but it is certainly an important public health issue that needs to be recognized for its impact on children, families, and communities.

Mental health for children can look different than mental health for adults. For children, it could mean reaching developmental and emotional milestones. It could include learning how to cope with problems, having healthy social skills and a positive quality of life, and functioning well at home, in school, and in their communities.

Sometimes a parent sees serious changes in the way their child typically learns, behaves, or handles emotions; this could be the result of an emerging mental disorder. It is estimated that 1 out of 5 children experience a mental disorder every year. Not all mental and behavioral disorders can be diagnosed in childhood. Some examples of disorders that begin in childhood include:

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
Behavior disorders
Mood and anxiety disorders
Substance use disorders
Tourette Symdrome

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To Parents: You know your child. If you have concerns about the way your child behaves at home or in school, contact Help Me Grow or talk to your child's health care professional.

To Youth: If you feel angry, worried, or sad, reach out to a friend or adult to talk about your feelings. Your mental health is just as important as the health of your body.

To Teachers: If you have concerns about the mental health of a student in your school, work with families and health care professionals so that those students can get the help they need and have a disorder identified early.

Developmental Leaps

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Has your baby been driving you crazy the past couple of weeks? Have you noticed that no matter what you do, you can't seem to make her happy or comfort her? Or maybe he has suddenly begun not eating very well or waking up in the middle of the night? With all of this stress and based on your child's erratic behavior, you might be thinking, "Is there something wrong with my parenting skills?"

GOOD NEWS PARENTS!! We might not be doing anything wrong and there might not be anything wrong with our baby. Child development researchers have described these fussy phases as a signal of great and drastic changes in a baby’s mental development. "During these times, his brain is giving him new possibilities. So many possibilities, in fact, that the world around him seems totally different and new. No wonder he is fussy! He needs to get a grip on this ‘new world’ suddenly in front of him. As a result, he acts out and becomes more Clingy, Cranky and Cries more" (The Wonder Weeks).

  

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Many professionals call these changes in a baby's mental development "Developmental Leaps." Other professionals might call them "Touchpoints." Either way the definition for both is the same:

Predictable periods of time during a child’s development where a child will “leap” from one skill (e.g. motor, cognitive, or emotional skills) to a more difficult skill. During this “leap,” or period of rapid growth, a child’s behavior falls apart, they go into a state of neurological disorganization, and the previous skills they had achieved can be shelved for a while as they are focusing keenly on achieving the new and more difficult skill. “Every time a baby goes through a leap they perceive things they couldn't do before. It’s like the whole world around them changes” (Ask the experts: Baby leaps).

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One example of a Developmental Leap can be seen in a four month old baby as he or she goes through a burst in cognitive awareness of his or her environment. "The baby will be difficult to feed. He will stop eating to look around and to listen to every stimulus in the environment. To parents’ dismay, he will begin to awaken again at night. His awareness of his surroundings will be enhanced by a burst in visual development. Yet, [as parents], when [we] understand the disorganization of this period as a natural precursor to the rapid and exciting development that follows, [we] will not need to feel as if it represents failure" (Touchpoints, 2003). 

Understanding that Developmental Leaps could be a possible reason for our child's behavior or development can help us navigate through these predictable spurts and the issues that these spurts may raise in our families. Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, M.D., the author of Touchpoints: The Essential Reference--Your Child's Emotional and Behavioral Development , pointed out in his book that "Each [leap] accomplished leads to a new sense of autonomy. When seen as normal and predictable, these periods of regressive behavior are opportunities to understand the child more deeply and to support his or her growth, rather than to become locked into a struggle. A child’s particular strengths and vulnerabilities, as well as temperament and coping style, all come to the surface at such a time. What a chance for understanding the child as an individual!” (p. xvii-xviii).

Some common signs that your child might be going through a Developmental Leap include:

• eating less
• sleeping less or waking up a lot of the time
• digressing in his/her development instead of forward
• crying more
• being cranky
• clinging to you all the time
• being ill more often
• not being satisfied no matter what you do

Recognizing Developmental Leap periods is a great resource of knowledge that can help us navigate through our child's development. Raising a child is hard, but equipping ourselves with the knowledge that will better help us understand our child's development may save us from many unneeded hardships.

Have you noticed any Developmental Leap periods your child has gone through or maybe is going through?

A Journey of Milestones: Be There.

Children seem to just grow so fast! Don't you think? Sometimes you blink, and they've already gone from crawling, to running all over the house as you try to keep up! As your precious children develop, they embark on a journey of milestones.

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Though there are many milestones children go through, here are some milestones you can look out for so you don't miss a beat! As you check off these milestones, it will help you see how your child is progressing.

6 Months

• Copies sounds
• Begins to sit without support
• Likes to play with others, especially parents
• Responds to own name
• Strings vowels together when babbling ("ah," "eh," "oh")

12 Months

• Uses simple gestures such as shaking head for "no" or waving "bye bye"
• Copies gestures
• Responds to simple spoken requests
• Says "mama" and "dada"
• Pulls up to stand

18 Months

• Plays simple pretend, such as feeding a doll
• Points to show others something interesting
• Knows what ordinary things are for; for example, telephone, brush, spoon
• Says several single words
• Walks alone

2 Years

• Says sentences with 2 to 4 words
• Gets excited when with other children
• Follows simple instructions
• Kicks a ball
• Points to things or pictures when they're named

3 Years

• Copies adults and friends (like running when other children run)
• Carried on a conversation using 2 to 3 sentences
• Climbs well
• Plays make-believe with dolls, animals and people
• Shows affection for friends without prompting

4 Years

• Hops and stands on one foot for up to 2 seconds
• Would rather play with other children than alone
• Tells stories
• Draws a person with 2 to 4 body parts
• Plays cooperatively

(Source for milestones)

As a parent you may question whether or not your child is on track developmentally. Help Me Grow Utah is a free information line that helps families connect with resources. So, put your mind at ease and check out the resources, information, screening questionnaires, and developmental activities we offer!

We know how important your children are to you. BE with your child as they are on this journey, and don't forget to take lots of pictures for memories!

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"Together, we focus on your child's development so you can focus on your child's future."

DIRECT CONTACT INFO:

801.691.5322

helpmegrow@unitedwayuc.org

Why I Love the ASQ!

One of my favorite FREE Help Me Grow services is receiving the Ages & Stages Questionnaire (ASQ), a tool you can use to track your child’s development! The ASQ is available from birth until age five and a half. Here are some of my reasons why I love the ASQ!

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 1.      Let’s talk kindergarten readiness. Did you know that families who complete an ASQ at least once per year are more likely to have a child who thrives in kindergarten? Less than 50% of children with delays have had them addressed before kindergarten. And keep in mind that some delays are visible or readily apparent, while some are less so. The ASQ can help identify both. That alone makes the ASQ worth taking…and worth taking more than once.

2.      The ASQ is a friendly questionnaire that helps you identify & celebrate your child’s strengths. Your child is unique, and lucky for you, the ASQ will help identify your child’s strengths. Completing the ASQ should be fun. Remember to celebrate your child’s success no matter how big or small it may be.

3.      On the flip-side, the ASQ may ask a question that you just hadn’t thought of trying with your child. These types of questions prompt you to try something new with your child! Ask your care coordinator to send you supplemental developmental activities to continue to strengthen your child’s development.

4.      But honestly my favorite part… the ASQ pinpoints areas you can discuss with your doctor. I don’t know about you, but I HATE going to the doctor and being sent on my way a few minutes later without having time to formulate questions I would like to ask.

5.      Baby journaling. Alright for those of you who are big journal writers, you can put a copy of the ASQ in your baby’s journal to highlight developmental milestones. Admit it, we’ve all looked back on the baby books our parents did for us and oohed and aahed at the milestones our parents recorded for us… or worse, the empty blanks our busy parents never recorded. Add the ASQ into the journal as a supplement or go ahead and just add the ASQ in there and call it good.

6.      The ASQ is an evidence-based tool. For the nerd in me, this is important to me for valid results. A ton of research and testing went into the ASQ. The ASQ asks questions that are sensitive enough to pick up on developmental issues that your child may need more support with.

The ASQ is a great tool to monitor your child’s development. It highlights your child’s strengths and can also identify areas of concern. If you do have any concerns, Help Me Grow can send you information, answer tough parenting questions, and help you connect with local community resources. 

Are you ready to try one out? Click HERE to complete the ASQ online now, or click HERE to receive one by mail! 

Monsters under the Bed

This is what pure joy looks like :) 

I am 100% obsessed with my nephew. I know I am slightly biased, but I am pretty sure the world revolves around him. The other day my sister posted this facebook status, 


"I think Aiden has officially started having little nightmares  He's woken up crying from his naps a few times and is pretty inconsolable for a few minutes, but this morning he woke up at 2:30am crying and calling for me. Through his tears he said "I scared" and "I want to sleep in Mommy's bed." It broke my mommy heart"

It broke my auntie heart, so I wanted to research it more. I had no idea that kids at young as two years old could experience nightmares. Our wonderful child developmental specialist broke down nightmares into three  different categories.

Night terrors:
The child is not aware and cannot be woken up
The child won't be aware or remember it
Time is limited, and the child will come out of it on their own
What to do: Make sure your child is safe and stay nearby until the night terror is over

Nightmares:
Child is sort of awake
Child is distressed
Its like a bout of mini-PTSD from the day
What to do: If you are aware of a stressful situation during the day, give your child a way to externalize their distress. Have some extra play time and make sure to end the day on a happy, calming note. 

Neural Discharge:
Child is on the verge of a developmental leap. Fears will crop up at periods of new and rapid development. Your child might be exhausted but their brain is on overdrive because they are learning something new- for example how to stand, walk or talk. Their brain will be firing all sorts of signals which can keep a child awake, or cause them to wake up in the middle of the night.   
What to do: Two hours before bedtime, practice the milestone as much as the child wants (like standing up and down 100x), and then one hour before bedtime, have slowdown time to help their minds slow down and get to sleep. 

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Nightmares can also occur during transition periods like moving houses, getting a new sibling, or starting school. You can help ease these types of nightmares by talking about the transition in positive ways and easing the child into the situation. 

Here are 7 tips to help a child learn to cope with fears and nightmares found from this website:

• Comfort your child and take their fears seriously, but don't add your own anxiety to hers.
• Look under the bed, in the closet. Let your child understand that this is for her comfort, not because you recognize danger.
• Firm limits on bedtime are reassuring.
• A comforting loving hug always helps.
• Help your child learn ways of comforting herself when she wakes in fear. She can distract herself by singing songs, making up stories, or thinking pleasant thoughts.
• Throughout the day, model your own way of handling your aggression.
• Read fairy tales together because they encourage young children to face their own fears and angry feelings.

If you have had any experiences or advice on dealing with nightmares in young children, let us know below! 

Track and Enhance Your Child's Development

Finding out I was pregnant was one of those moments I will never forget. As I stared at those two little pink lines my mind raced through all that this meant. I thought about what it would be like to bring a new baby home, to entertain a toddler, to watch my child leave for their first day of school. One thing I knew was that I wanted to be prepared. I wanted to know what to expect. I wanted to know what was normal.

Many parents worry about what is normal and what is not. When should a child start taking their firsts steps? How long will this separation anxiety last? When will my child start talking?

Answers to these and other questions can be found at parentingcounts.org. Their developmental timeline  addresses key milestones from birth to 5 years of age. Each milestone addressed falls under one of four key areas of development; physical, social, learning, and communication. Parents can click on the
milestones  they see to learn more information about the specifics of that checkpoint.

On the timeline parents can also find informational videos on the timeline geared towards enhancing their child’s development. Topics covered include everything from reading to babies to helping your children feel secure.

All of the information found on the Parenting Counts Developmental timeline and website is provided by the Talaris Insitute, an organization that provides parents and caregivers with reliable information to support healthy development.

Another great resource for parents looking to track their child’s development is the Ages and Stages Questionnaire (ASQ), a free developmental screening that parents complete themselves at home. The ASQ is a great tool to help parents learn about their child’s strengths and notice any areas of concern. This resource is offered through Help Me Grow and can be accessed through our website or through ASQ Online

Problem Solving The Baby Way

 What infants, toddlers, and children do best to learn, is explore! From a very tiny age babies are learning  lessons of cause and effect. When parents interact with their child with love and trust, children start to make sense of the world around them. (For more information on child Cognitive Development from ages 0-3 click here ).  

Exploring, making faces, picking up a book and wanting to be read to, are some of the many ways your child starts to problem solve. If you want to track your child's problem solving development, click here!

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             Problem Solving Milestones

Birth to 3 Months

Watches faces

Moves or makes noises to get attention

Learning to manage sleep/wake states

4 to 6 Months

Explores textures/objects: touch, mouthing, banging

Repeating pleasurable activities

Simple object and people permanence

7 to 9 Months

Imitating sounds and gestures

Repetitive cause & effect play

Combines related objects in play 

9 to 12 Months

Simple trial and error

Playing with toys with their intended purpose

Searches for hidden or missing objects – harder to distract

12 to 24 Months

Imitates adult activities

Matching and sorting – recognizing similarities

Pretend play with realistic and then non-realistic props

24 to 36 Months

Sustained attention to preferred activities (15-60 min)

Enjoys stories and books

Pretend play with real life and emotional themes 

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Here are some fun activities that you can do with your child to help them learn how to problem solve :

BOOKS
Sharing Books: look at books together, point to and label pictures, share excitement about what the child sees and is interested in, tell stories about the pictures instead of reading the words only.

BALLS
Balls and Bins:  Play with different size balls and bowls or boxes.  Play with how many balls you can get in a container or which balls are too big or small for a certain container.  Talk about the problem-solving process with your child as you play.

BLOCKS
10 Ways to Play with a Block: Stack and crash, line up to make a train, come up with as many ways to play with the blocks as you can.

These are just some examples of Problem Solving skills. Each child develops differently, if you are concerned about your child's development contact us here!

The Teeny Tiny Motor Movements

Tying shoes, turning pages, using a fork, picking up toys, throwing a ball. These are all the tiny fine motor movements of a young child. The ability to use hands and fingers with confidence is important for young children.  These small muscle movements fun to watch develop and there are so many activities you can do with your child to help them as they improve their fine motor control. If you want to track your child's fine motor development, click here!

For example, one question asks  “Does your 2 month old grasp your finger if you touch the palm of her hand?” or for a 14 moth old,  "Does your baby throw a small ball with a forward motion?"

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Fine motor milestones

 Birth to 4 Months

Regards colorful object momentarily

Moves arms symmetrically, Brings hands to mid-line

Follows with eyes moving person while in multiple positions

Grasps toy actively

4 to 8 Months

Looks at distant and smaller objects. Can follow with eyes w/o moving head

Reaches for objects with both arms

Retains small object in both hands

Rakes at small objects

8 to 12 Months

Bangs 2 toys together at mid-line

Takes objects out of container

Releases objects voluntarily

Pokes with index finger

Uses crayon, tries to imitate scribbles

12 to 18 Months

Scribbles spontaneously

Puts 3 or more objects in container, dumps container to retrieve objects

Builds tower with at least 3 blocks

Points with index finger

Uses neat pincer grasp

18 to 24 Months

Imitates vertical and circular drawing strokes

Builds tower with 4+ blocks

Attempts to fold paper

24 to 36 Months

Holds crayon with fingers and thumb, imitates simple forms (cross)

Strings large beads

Snips with scissors

Folds paper in half

Imitates multiple forms with blocks

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Doing fine motor activities together helps you as a parent observe your child's progress and strengthen your relationship and attachment. Check out our previous posts for great ideas of things you can do with your child to help improve their fine motor skills such as: cooking together, Parent-Child Yoga, or even making snow with scissors. 

The following provides a basic outline of fine motor developmental milestones. Remember each child is developing individually, so don’t become discouraged if your child is not on track in all elements. If you are concerned about the progress of your child, contact us here.

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Look Mom, I'm Walking!

Walking and talking are the two most exciting milestones that parents look forward to because this is when their baby is developing more human-like behavior. 

Most babies start walking around 12 months, but some 7 month old babies have been known to skip crawling and go straight to walking!

Have you ever thought about the many muscles, nerves, and skill that go into walking? It's amazing! Before a baby can walk he needs to first develop enough strength to pull himself up, and then he needs to develop balance to stay standing. Once he has mastered those two steps, he needs to learn how to coordinate movement in both legs to start taking steps.

10 Months

At this age you should be able to hold onto your baby's hands to help him gain muscle strength, this also helps him learn how to put his weight on his feet.

You should also see your baby grabbing onto her crib rails or other furniture as she learns how to balance. She is also building strength in her little muscles, preparing to take her first step!

You can help her master the skill of muscle and balance by offering toys to him and encourage him to hold on to furniture with one hand and reach for the toy with the other. This gives him confidence and balance, which he'll need a lot of for the next big 'step.'

12 Months

By now, your baby should be able to hold onto furniture and walk alongside. She should also be able to hold on with one hand and reach down to pick up toys that may be in her way. 

She should also be able to step forward while you hold onto her hands. She may even be able to walk easily with a little help from you. 

When you baby is holding onto furniture, try standing a couple feet away and encouraging them to walk towards you. You can also give them boxes to push around. This helps give them support while they walk without relying solely on you. Babies also love to push around chairs, toy shopping carts, and pretty much anything that will move. 

14 Months

By this age you can expect your baby to stand up all by himself and he may even be walking all by himself! You can expect to see him become more adventurous by trying to climb onto furniture or intentionally walk over a variety of surfaces.

You can have some fun by taking him to the park and letting him feel the grass, cement, and other fun surfaces. Continue to encourage him to walk if he hasn't quite developed the courage yet, and give him lots of opportunities to stand, push, walk and explore!

Remember, walking can start anywhere between 7 months and 14 months. Each baby is unique and will start when he/she is ready. Remember to baby proof your house before  they become mobile, and to provide support and opportunities for practicing their emerging skill.